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Who eats dinner at Benihana at 10:30 PM besides me? The star of 30 Rock and former SNL cast member Tracy Morgan does, that's who.
After walking into the overcrowded, over hibachi smelling, 1987 designed eatery in Manhattan last night, we spot Tracy Morgan sitting in the waiting area with a pissed off look apparently waiting for a table.
Since Benihana is set up where you join others at the same table, I decided to walk up to the host/manager/I’ll do anything for $20 guy and offer him $20 to sit me next to Tracy and his girlfriend. He quickly snatched up the cash, smiled his “I apparently haven’t gone to the dentist in the last 15 years” coffee stained teeth smile at me and said “No problem”.
After about 10 minutes (and 3 shots of grey goose sucked down by my girlfriend), we get brought to our seats. And just like the guy promised, we’re sitting next to Tracy!
I am 1000% not kidding when I say – HE DID NOT SAY 1 SINGLE WORD TO HIS GIRLFRIEND THE ENTIRE DINNER. There was no “How was your day today?” There was no “So what are you going to order?” There wasn’t even any “Don’t touch my food girl!”
They must have been in a fight or something because Tracy was MORE than happy to talk to me and the table of 14 year olds next to us who kept coming over for awkward “I’m white and 14” hi-fives and pictures.
After I pointed out to Tracy that we share the same birthday (he just turned 40, I just turned 30), he opened up about how “dude, life doesn’t bleep bleep bleep start until you’re 40. Bleep”.
His girlfriend (who is probably 20 years his junior and moved here from Virginia to live with him) was really nice to us as well, but apparently had nothing to say to her man (who is not only paying for her dinner, but is paying for her online education as well as she told us). When the 14 year olds kept coming up to him, I asked if that was annoying for her. She replied “It saves me from having to talk to him.”
After watching the samurai guy do the onion volcano trick, flip a couple shrimp into his puffy red hat, and slice and dice food onto our plates, Tracy abruptly asked for the bill, paid and left. I know there’s starving kids in 3rd world countries, but he left so much lobster and shrimp on his plate that I was wondering why he even went out to dinner.
I gotta say this, Tracy Morgan is EXACTLY, and I mean EXACTLY the same person as he is on TV. Totally cool guy to me, I just feel bad for his girlfriend who either pissed him off or needs to work on her in-public social skills.
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